Long Live
by XOXOJordan
Summary: Mark and Lexies journey at life and love. One shots revolving around my favorite couple of Grey's anatomy. Enjoy.
1. Chapter 1

**Here's my attempt at the iPod drabble. Its Mark and Lexie of course after all they are my favorite Greys Anatomy couple. Lately I have been writing stories about them like crazy. I think I'm just going to post a story were I can post my random Slexie oneshots. Anyways I hope you enjoy! Please review and check out my other story about Mark and Lexie's journey after the shooting.**

**XOXOJordan**

**1. Can't take my eyes of you- Lady Antebellum.**

Mark laid it bed with one arm supporting his head the other wrapped around her waist, there legs intertwined. Her mouth was slightly open and he could have sworn she had drooled a little in her sleep. All he could do was smile as he watched her sleep, holding her close and not letting go.

He had never felt this way with any other girl before and right this moment he couldn't take his eyes off her.

She started so stir and slowly she opened her eyes turning to face Mark. "Why are you staring at me?" She asked him as she rubbed her sleep filled eyes.

"You look beautiful." He told her with a smile before pulling her close and tucking her head under his chin kissing the top of her head.

Mark was falling hard for Lexie and for once he wasn't scared.

**2. Just so you know - Jesse McCartney**

Lexie new this was wrong in ever single aspect. He was her attending her teacher. He was her sisters post- it husbands best friend. He was off limits, territory that was supposed to stay untouched. She should not be having feelings for this man, this doctor, this teacher.

She didn't know what to do though. How do you make feelings like this for someone just vanish? How do you turn away from your own feelings? Her feelings were getting the best of her, taking control of her and she couldn't stop it.

She couldn't stand to be around him any longer. She had so many things left unsaid and she couldn't hide it much longer. She didn't know how she could pretend to be find around him when she wasn't.

Downing her drink she walked over to where he was sitting at the bar. "I cant sit around and pretend I don't have feelings for you because I do and I know that I shouldn't. You're my attending, my teacher and I'm just a pathetic intern. I have tried to get rid of these feelings trust me I have but I cant and-" Lexie was cut off by Marks lips colliding with hers and her previous thoughts were long forgotten.

**3. Someday when I stop loving you - Carrie Underwood**

Mark watched as she grabbed her suitcase and walked out of the door out of her life. The love of his life was walking away from him, leaving him in the dust. She had had enough. She wasn't ready to start a family with him and have kids.

He had bet everything he had on him and Lexie's relationship. They had a 3% survival rate but he was sure they would last. He had sacrificed so much for her, not that he really cared at the time. He loved her and would do anything for her.

He was going to have to learn to let her go. He would have to move on just like she was but he new that wouldn't be easy. He wasn't going to stop loving Lexie. Ever. Not until the dessert flooded and the grass turned blue would he stop loving her

**4. It is what is it - Lifehouse**

He wanted to start a family. She wasn't ready for that commitment, she was only twenty five she was still a child in her own eyes. She could hardly remember to take care of herself how was she supposed to be able to take care of a child?

Mark he didn't understand that, he had lived his life and was ready to step up and start a family. He was done being a child and only thinking about his life and himself.

Both wanting something completely different. They couldn't change the others mind and it was done. They had been denying what was happening to there world. They went from happy couple not having a care in the couple who couldn't agree on things.

They had hit a roadblock, a wall and they couldn't get over it.

**5. Don't you wanna stay - Jason Aldean**

She was in idiot. How could she possibly think this was ok? That she could just barge into Mark Sloan's hotel room and ask him to "Teach Me" Meaning sex of course. It was wrong in so many levels. He was her attending! Her teacher. Slowly she slipped out of his grasp praying he was asleep. She was almost off then bed when she felt his hand wrap around her arm.

"Stay."

Turning around she looks at him. She knows she shouldn't do this. She should just leave before things get more complicated then they already are going to be,

"Stay." He tells her again, this time there is a pleading look in her eyes.

Slowly Lexie crawls back into bed and Mark once again wraps his arms around her holding her tight.

**6. I'll stand by you - Glee Cast**

Mark was walking past the residents locker room when he heard the soft sobs of someone coming from the closed door. He stopped wondering if he should go in or just walk away pretending he had never heard it. He was never good with teary eyed women. Hearing the sobs get louder he figured he might as well see who it was.

Opening the door he looked around only to find Lexie sitting hunched in the corner tears falling down her face. It broke his hear to see her breaking down like this. Walking over to her he sat down next to her pulling her close.

"Shh Lex. Its going to be ok. Everything's going to be ok." He told her as he held her tight.

"He almost killed me. He- he pointed his gu- his gun at me." She sobbed into his warm chest.

"He's gone Lexie, he can't hurt you anymore." He told her as he just held her crying shaking body.

**7. Just the way you are - Bruno Mars**

"How do I look?" Lexie asked as she stepped out of the bathroom door. Her brown eyes standing out as her hair fell like a waterfall along her neck and down her back. She had on a tight black dress that fit to her every curve, with just a hint of blush and lip gloss. "It doesn't make my hips look to big or my butt look pointy does it?"

"You look beautiful." Mark replied with a grin just trying to take in beauty.

"Are you sure your not just saying that because your supposed to?" she asked nervously. "I can go change."

"Lexie." He replied softly standing up behind her and wrapping his arms around her. "There is not a thing about you I would change. Your amazing just the way you are."

**8. Ours - Taylor Swift **

They had a 3% chance at this relationship actually surviving. The odds were stacked against them. There were bets going against them about how long they were going to last. The two were going to be in for a rough ride with the stakes high and the water rough but it didn't matter.

They loved one another for who they were. Her heart was his and she could care less about what the interns said behind her back. Watching Mark place his chart down at the nurses station, she walked over to him grabbed him by the neck and kissed him, hard,

"Dr. Grey." Mark says shocked at what had just happened.

"They think that your taking advantage of me. They think that I'm using you, but they don't know us. They think that were ugly but I know that were beautiful and we can adapt to a hostile environment." Pleased with her confession she grabbed Marks hand and walked away leaving the interns to gawk over what had just happened.

**9. Enchanted - Taylor Swift**

She spotted him out of the corner of her eye, sitting at the bar all alone drinking a beer. She had seen him around the hospital, she new his reputation. He was a manwhore a womanizer, shacking up with different nurses in the on call rooms. He looks so lonely sitting by himself and she finally gets up the nerve to walk over to him.

Sitting down next to him she gives him a small smile before asking the bartender for another. "I'm Lexie." She tells him with a smile.

"Mark." He replies grinning. "Have we meet before?" He asks

"I uh I'm a new Intern." Lexie tells him stuttering over her words a little bit.

"Wait a minute are you the girl with the photographic memory?" Mark asks all but to excited.

"Sure am." She says with a smile taking a drink of her own beer.

"Periodic table. Go." He tells her.

Later on that night Lexie lays in bed playing the night over and over again. She had fun with Mark. He was kind and he made her laugh with his witty banter. It was the best night she had had in a while. Sure her sister wanted nothing to do with her and all the attending at the hospital thought she was a stupid pathetic intern but tonight with Mark she felt wanted. She felt like someone actually enjoyed her company, that she wasn't someone just taking up space. Then she had the lingering question in the back of her mind. Was he with someone else?

"Dear God, please don't let him be in love with someone else." Lexie whispers out loud as a small tear falls down her face.

**10. No air - Jordin Sparks**

He was moving on, to Teddy non the less. He was officially getting over her and moving on. She couldn't lose him she just couldn't. Living without him was like living in a world with no air. She needed him in her life, she need him to be there for her. To hold her when the going got tough. To tell her that everything would be ok in the end, that she had him and that's all that mattered.

Turning away from Alex she rushes off to the bathroom only to find Meredith by the sink washing her hands.

"Hey." Meredith tells her younger sister cheerfully, receiving no reply. "You ok?"

Lexie looks back at the door, thinking about leaving but something stops here. "Marks moving on. Like really." She tells her sister as she bites her lip trying to hold back the tears.

"Ok well that's good isn't it? isn't that what you wanted?" Meredith asks confused.

"No its, that's, its that's great that's perfect it's perfect." Lexie rambles on moving her hands all over the place. "It's perfect." She repeats out loud to herself before she crumbles to the floor sobbing.

Mark was her air and without him she just couldn't breath.


	2. You Found Me

Lexie hated this, she hated that these documentary guys were here to film them. Couldn't the hospital have any peace and quiet? They were all over the news for months and now here's a film crew excepting them to answer every little question. Well maybe she wasn't ready to answer these questions yet. Sighing she closed the chart she had been reading just as a camera man approached her. Turning around she leans against the nurses station, bracing herself for whatever questions that pop out at her. They would probably ask about the fact that she had been checked into psych. She could read the headlines now. Crazy doctor at Seattle Grace!

"Lexie Grey, Right?" He asks. Lexie nods her head not bothering to say a word. "Can you till us a little about what you were feeling that day? We heard you and Dr. Mark Sloane had to operate on one of your own?"

She froze. Why did they have to bring up Mark? She thought she was going to do ok until they brought him into it. "Uh yea, We uh- we found Alex, Dr. Karev in a elevator he was shot."

"Is it true that the gun man wanted you?"

That day came flooding back to her mind like it was just yesterday. The gun being pointed at her. The sound of a gun going off. Thinking it had been her that was shot. She remembered waiting, waiting for the pain to come. Then she realized she wasn't shot she was actually ok. So she got up and ran. She ran as fast as she could.

"Dr. Grey?" The reporter asked

Lexie shook her head realizing she had been day dreaming. "I'm sorry what did you ask?"

Mark watched as they interviewed her. He saw the pain in her eyes that came with every question. These guys were coming in and asking questions that some of us where just not ready to answer. Sure it had been six months, half a year but it was still to early. People were still in mourning, people were still scared. Lexie being one of those people. He had to stay here and watch her interview. Incase something went wrong, Lexie might need him. Pretending to copy stuff down in a chart he would peak over and listen in on what they were saying.

"We asked if it was true that the gunman was after you."

"Oh right." She said nodding her head. "He uh, he-" She felt like the world was closing in on her. She couldn't do this, not right now, maybe never. "I uh I got to go." She told the reports as she turned around and ran down the hall.

Watching her leave the reporters he dropped his chart and ran after her. She needed him, now more then ever. Opening the nearest on call room he found her dry heaving into a trash can. Her breathing heavy and tears streaming down her face. She was having a panic attack. Walking over to her he stood behind her wrapping his arms around her.

"Lexie, breathe." He told her gently, guiding her to sit on the floor.

"I. Can't" She replied gasping for air.

"Lex. Look at me." Placing his hands softly on each side of her face, he began to breath in and out. "Do it with me. Breathe in." He told her as he inhaled, Lexie did as she was told. "Now exhale. Good just take deep breathes." Soon the gasping for air had subsided and the only sounds were her deep breathes and sobs. He didn't talk, he just held her tight and let her cry.

In hour later Mark was holding her as she slept curled up in his embrace. Sighing as his pager went off for the second time he threw it across the floor. The hospital could wait, no way was he going to leave a broken Lexie like this. She was broken and she needed him to put her back together. She had tear stained cheeks and her face was red from crying so much. He watched the rise and fall of her chest and how peaceful she looked asleep, even though he new otherwise.

"Maybe I should talk to someone." He hears her say.

"I thought you were asleep."

"I was, I woke up." She told him turning around to face him. "Maybe I am crazy, maybe I should see some shrink or something." She tells him with a sigh.

"Your not crazy Lex. People go and see counselors all the time."

"So you think I should go?"

"I think it might help. To talk to someone I mean." He pulls her close and rest his head on her shoulder, wrapping his arms tighter. "It doesn't have to be professional. You can talk to me you know that right Lex?"

"Yeah I know that." Lexie turns around so she's looking right at him. "Thanks for finding me today Mark."

"I'll always find you Lex." He replied softly as he kissed the top of her head.


	3. Misteltoe

It was snowing outside. It rarely snowed in Seattle. It was usually just rain, rain, and more rain but not tonight. Walking outside the front doors of Seattle Grace Mercy West Hospital you would find a fresh layer of snow glistering in the street lights. Lexie smiled when she saw the snow covered ground. She had always loved the snow. As a kid her and her sister Molly would always be the first kids in there neighborhood to go play in it, making snow angles and snowman. They would spend all morning playing in the snow until there mom called them in for lunch. They then would head inside for hot chocolate by the fire and grilled cheese sandwiches.

Stepping out into the snowy night Lexie buttoned up her pea coat before slipping on her gloves. She may love the snow but it wasn't worth getting sick over and having to miss work. After enjoying the snows beauty for a few more moments she headed to her car ready to go home. She had a Christmas party to attend to after all.

It was a week before Christmas and Meredith decided it would be the perfect time to host a party. Even though it was just planned that morning, word spread fast at the hospital and soon everyone new about the party. By the time Lexie arrived the driveway and curb was full of cars. Reaching the front door she stomped her shoes trying to track as little snow as possible before entering the house.

She wasn't surprised to see the house full of people, many of them being people she worked with. She spotted April and Jackson talking in a corner of the living room. She was surprised the two hadn't started to go out or whatever. It was obvious they liked one another, a lot.

"Lex you made it!" Meredith said a little too enthusiastic.

"Well I do live here." Lexie said trying to fake a smile. That's when she noticed the tequila filled glass. That explained it all.

"I'll get you a drink." Meredith told her younger sister, ignoring her facial expression and dragging her into the kitchen. Five minutes later Lexie had her own tequila filled glass in hand. Meredith had disappeared somewhere so she figured now was the perfect time to mingle.

She was standing in the doorway to the living room when she felt a tap on her shoulder and someone clearing there throat. Turning around she found Mark standing there with a grin on his face. She must have had a puzzled look on her face because he motioned upwards and that's when she saw it. A mistletoe, hanging right above the two surgeons heads.

"Your joking." Lexie told him with an eye roll.

"It's a rule." He replied crossing his arms leaning against the door frame casually. "You have to obey the rules Grey."

She laughed. "Since when do you go by the rules?"

"Come on Lex. Its one kiss."

"No." She replied stubbornly

"Afraid your gonna fall for my charming looks all over again?" He asked with a grin.

"I am not going to-." Lexie was cut off by Marks lips colliding with hers and the warmth of his hands being placed on her cheeks. She wanted to pull away but she just couldn't all she could do was close her eyes and feel the sparks rippling threw her body. What seemed like forever lasted only a few seconds and soon it was over.

Mark pulled away with a huge grin on his face. "Now was that so hard?" He asked with a smirk, not bothering to get in answer he walked away leaving a shell shocked Lexie.

It takes Lexie a few moments to gather up her thoughts. Mark thought he could just kiss her and then walk away like nothing every happened. He figured he would make her come back wanting more. Anger flooded through her body. Walking in the same direction he had headed she went to find him. She spotted him over by the fire place taking to some blonde headed nurse. She was probably his next conquest.

Not taking her eyes off the two she stormed over to them, grabbed the back of Marks head and kissed him. Hard on the lips. After a few moments of there tongues wrestling with one another she pulled away with a smile on her face and walked away. It was only a matter of time before he was the one coming back for more.

Satisfied Lexie grabbed her coat and went to set outside and enjoy the snow and its beauty. It was only a matter of minutes before she heard the front door open and someone approach her.

"That was just…" Mark said trying to find the words to describe what had just happened. "Wow." He finally decided on as he sat down next to her.

"Now who's coming back for more?" She told him with a grin.

"This isn't some game Lexie." Mark replied bitterly.

"You kissed me first." She stated blankly.

"And you thought I was playing some game?"

"Well yea."

"Damn it Lexie. I'm not over you!" Mark replied angrily with hurt showing in his eyes. Lexie couldn't believe it. She had thought Mark was just toying with her. She hadn't meant to hurt him, she thought it was a game.

"Mark I-" Not knowing what to say she let her sentence trail off silence soon over coming the two.

"Do you or do you not want to be with me?" Mark asked breaking the silence. "We can't keep doing the Lexie. You either want to be with me or you don't."

Lexie looked up at him. She new he meant well. Six months ago she had wanted nobody but Mark. She wanted him to be the man she woke up next to in the morning, not Alex not any other guy, just Mark. But was that still what she wanted? A lot had happened, she was finally moving on with her life, and not just from Mark from the shooting as well.

But sitting her right next to him with snow falling around them deep down she new the answer. Biting her lip she faced him once again looking into his deep blue eyes. He gave her one last pleading look before she wrapped her arms around his neck kissing him for the third time that night. "Iv always wanted to be with you." She said answering his previous question.

With the snow coming down all around them and Mark wrapping his arm around her pulling her close, Lexie felt like she was in heaven. Never wanting the moment to end.


	4. The Mistakes We Make

This was supposed to be the best day of her life. It was her wedding day. She was about say 'I Do' to a man she loved, a man she had thought loved her. Then why was she packing up her bags when she should be making her way down the alter? She had to get out of here, this town, this city. She couldn't stay here not with all the memories of what the two of them could be.

Lexie threw her remaining clothes in a bag before calling a taxi. Grabbing her suitcases she pulled them down the steps from the attic and into the living room. She wasn't going to cry, not over this.

She was almost free, there was a honk of the horn, signaling that the taxi was there. Opening the door she found her self face to face with the man she was running from.

"Lexie."

"Go away Mark." Lexie said as she tried to walk around him, to get out of the door but he was much larger then the brunette

"We're supposed to be getting married right now." He said with sadness in his eyes.

"Were is more like it." Lexie says with anger seeping in her voice.

"What is going on with you?"

"I saw you Mark ok!" Lexie said as tears being to fall down her cheeks. "I saw you with her!"

"Lexie, I can-"

"What? Explain?" She asked cutting him off. "You don't need to explain Mark! We were going to say are 'I do's' today! We were going to make that life time commitment with one another and you went and slept with some bar skank!"

"It wasn't what it looked like." Mark said running his hand through his hair.

"Like I haven't heard that before." Lexie said harshly as she pushed passed Mark and into the cab.

Mark sat at the bar for a fifth night in a row. She wouldn't return his calls, or his texts. Every time he called it went straight to voicemail. All he wanted to do was explain to her what happened. If she only new the full story then maybe they could fix things. They loved each other didn't they? If you were going to marry someone then shouldn't you be willing to try anything to make things work?

"Mark its time to go home." Joe said as he took the empty scotch glass from Marks hand.

"One more." He said with a slur.

"Mark, I already called Derek." Joe said to the very drunk surgeon. He new Mark wasn't usually like this, he honestly had no idea what had gotten into the surgeon.

"She left me because she saw me with my own sister." Mark told the bartender with a laugh. "My own sister!"

"Time to go home." Derek said as he walked into the bar only to find his best friend drunk, again.

"She wont even talk to me." Mark said as Derek helped him up and the two began to walk out to the cab. "She thinks I cheated on her. Once a manwhore always a manwhore." He told Derek with a bitter laugh.

"Just wait Mark, she will come around." Derek said with a sigh as he helped Mark into the cab and then into his apartment.

Lexie had no clue how long she was going to keep living in this hotel. It had been five days since she walked out on Mark. She had to go back to Settle, to her job and her friends. She couldn't let her life be put on hold because of some guy. No matter how much she loved him, and how much he broke her heart.

"Lexie come home." Meredith said to her sister later on that night. "He is miserable without you." She said with a sigh. "Derek has had to go pick him up from Joes every night this week."

"Well maybe he should have thought of what would happen before he cheated on me."

Lexie said bitterly. She didn't understand why everyone was siding with Mark. He cheated on her! The night before they were supposed to be getting married non the less.

"Lexie think about what you just said."

"I have nothing to think about." Lexie said harshly. "He saved me from making the biggest mistake of my life."

"You do not mean that." Meredith said with a sigh. She had always thought she was the stubborn one of the two, obviously she had been wrong.

"I would rather not marry him then marry a cheater." Lexie said as she grabbed a soda out of her hotel mini fridge just as there was a knock on her door. "Got to go." She told Meredith quickly as she hung up the phone and walked over to the door.

"I don't need my room cleaned." Lexie began to say as she opened the door. Her smile faded when she saw him standing there. Just as she was about to slam the door in his face, he stopped it by his foot. "Go away."

"No." He said sternly.

"I have nothing to say to you." She said as she walked away from the door and went and sat on her bed.

"Come home."

"No."

"Don't you want to make things work? If you would just let me explain." Mark said sadly as he sat down on the opposite bed, the two now facing each other.

"You cheated on me. I saw you with that other girl." Lexie said with bitterness in her voice. "There is nothing to explain. I was going to marry you Mark!" She shouted as the tears began to fall. "I thought I had found the man of my dreams! You made me happier then anyone ever has in my life and you went and slept with some girl."

"But I didn't!" Mark shouted.

"Don't lie. I saw you."

"For Gods sake Lex she was my sister!" Mark shouted once again. Lexie just stared at him shocked.

"Oh my God." Lexie said after a moment, slowly covering her mouth she sat down on the bed again. "I'm in idiot."

"I asked you to marry me, Lexie. Why in the world would I ever cheat on you?" He said as he sat down next to her. "How could you ever thing that?"

"I don't know." Lexie said as she buried her head in her hands. "I- I guess I was scared." She said looking at him. "You could do so much better then me."

"Your whats best for me Little Grey." Mark said as he cupped Lexies face with his hands and kissed her on the lips. "And I could never in a million years find anyone better then me."


	5. Revolving Circles

"You going home tonight?" Lexie asked Jackson as she changed out of her scrubs

"Look, I am not the kind of guy who waits around for the girl who's still in love with someone else. I'm just not."

Lexie sighed before slowly turning around and facing Jackson. "Mark he-"

"Yea I know he needs you." Jackson said with a slight eye roll. "You left him Lexie you cant go rescuing him every time something bad happens in his life."

"Mark and I, we understand each other." She said as she tried to think of a way to explain this.

"Pick," Jackson said simply. "It's me or It's him. So pick."

"Jackson." Lexie said sadly as she reached out to touch him but he pulled away.

"I'll see you around Lexie." he said before quickly walking out of the locker room and maybe even out of Lexie's life.

Lexie sighed as she sat down on a nearby bench. Why did she always seem like the bad guy in every relationship? Jackson looked so sad like his heart had been crushed. Why did relationships have to be so complicated? Why couldn't she just have sex. Lots and lots of sex. No feelings no emotions just sex. Then no hearts would break and there would be nothing to tie you to the other.

Lexie heard a noise and looked up to find Jackson walking towards his locker. She watched as he searched for something mumbling cuss words under his breath.

"Did you lose something?" She asked as she pushed herself up off the ground and walked over towards her now ex. He didn't want to ask for help.

He shouldn't need to but he really had no choice. "Can I use your house key?" he asked biting his tongue to any rude comment he had swarming inside his head.

Lexie walked over to her own locker and fished around in her purse looking for her key. "Here ya go." she said with a smile as she handed it to Jackson who didn't even bother to say a thank you.

Now that she was once again alone she figured she should go see how everyone was doing. It was nearly ten o'clock so the hospital was fairly quiet. She first checked the Attending locker room only to find it empty. Then it hit her. Quickly walking to the elevate she hit the four.

A moment later Lexie found herself standing at the NICU window. Over in the corner a man was hunched over watching a little baby. She new it was Mark with his silvery Gray hair.

"She looks like you." Lexie told him softly as she approached him. Wiping his eyes he turned to look at Lexie. He looked so torn up it nearly broke his heart. He was sleep deprived his eyes were swollen and red and he wasn't the happy going Sloan. "She's a Sloan. Sloan's are fighter." Lexie said as she placed a hand on his shoulder.

"I'm a doctor, a surgeon to be exact and I know the odds Lexie. I know that the odds are stacked against her."

"The odds were stacked against us too." Lexie told him.

"How is that supposed to make me feel better?"

"Because I'm here now aren't I?"

"You left me. You walked out on me without even listening to me."

"I was scared Mark. What was I supposed to say?" She asked with tears n her eyes. "Congratulations! Your gonna have a baby and I'm going to be left in the dust. Again."

"You could have been apart of it too."

"Don't you get it Mark? I didn't want to start a family like this. Not like I was obligated to be apart of it. I wanted to be the ones you had babies with. Not your best friend, your bed buddy."

"You think I asked for things to be this way? A child with someone who wasn't more then my best friend? A child who might not even live to see another day?" He asked her. "Things don't always happen the way we plan or want them to Lexie but we have to learn to deal with it"

The two sat in silence as they watched the tiny baby. She had so many wires and things attached to her. Her eyes were covered by a small mask and the only movement was the rise and fall of her tiny chest.

"Does she have a name?"

"Were waiting till Callie can help decide. I like Emma. Arizona likes Mia."

"She looks like a Mia." Silence once again filled the NICU.

"Why are you here Lexie?" Mark asked quietly.

"I still care about you Mark."

"What about Avery?"

"Were like magnates. No matter how different we are from one another we always come back to each other." She said as she grabbed his hand and squeezed it.

"I can't do this Lexie." Mark said pulling his hand away. "Maybe later but not, not right now." The surgeon quickly stood up mumbling something about going to check on Callie.

Lexie was left sitting there staring at the tiny baby in front of her and wondering when love got so complicated in her life.


	6. Haunted

**Based around the episode "Super Freak"**

**I already posted this once but I decided to move all my Grey's Anatomy one shots to one story. So enjoy again!**

She doest know how things got to this point. One minute her life's perfect, she has a boyfriend she thought she loved, a sister she never knew she had and a perfect job, a job she loved, a job she felt safe at. Then the next thing she knows everything's gone wrong. Her boyfriend picks his daughter over her, she starts to have sex with a jack ass, who at the time she thought was a nice guy and the hospital has a shooting. Now everyone walks around her like there standing on egg shells. They think that if one little thing goes wrong its back to the crazy ward for Lexie. They don't understand she's fine now she's not gonna crack Then to make matters worse she catches her ex boyfriend kissing some tramp who's her sisters, post-it husbands sister. Talk about complicated.

Now here she is back at Joes nursing her sorrows with a bottle of tequila. She's not sure how many she's had the others have already left and she's sitting in the back booth all alone. She probably looks like some pathetic little puppy who's just lost there owner. Sighing she downs another shot and tells Joe to keep them coming. She's so lost in her thoughts she doesn't even realize someone sitting across from her.

"Penny for your thoughts?" Mark asks with his signature McSteamy smile. Lexie just glares at him before taking another shot, pouring more and doing it all over again. She's about to pour another when Mark puts his hand over the shot glass. "Woah. Slow down there Lex."

She glares at him again. "Why do you care?" She spits out angrily.

"God Lex how many times do I have to tell you I care." He tells her with a sigh. "I care a whole fucking lot."

"Then how come an hour ago I saw your tongue down the throat of Derek's horish sister!" She shouts a little to loud.

"You saw that?" He asks quietly before running his hand threw his hair.

"You weren't exactly hiding it." She says bitterly grabbing the tequila and taking it straight from the bottle.

"She came on to me."

"Ya says the guy who sleeps with any girl within a mile radius."

Mark notices the slur in her voice and shakes his head. "Look your drunk, let me get you home and then we can talk about this in the morning." He tells her grabbing both the shot glass and the tequila.

"I can get my self home." Lexie snaps before sliding out of the booth. She moves a little to fast and has to grab onto the table for support.

"Yea if you want to get hit by a car instead." Standing up he wraps his arm around her waist guiding her out of the bar.

"Your still a jack ass." She slurs. Ignoring the comment Mark helps her into the car before getting into the passengers seat and driving to Meredith's.

He's never seen Lexie this drunk before. He hates the fact that its all his fault. She saw him kissing Amelia and now she hates him, more then she already did. He wants to tell her what exactly happened. Yea they kissed but what she didn't see was him pulling away. It didn't feel right, it was just a spontaneous action after many years of wanting. He had always had a thing for Amelia, but when they were younger she was off limits. Now here they were as Adults. No longer off limits. But now he didn't want her, but the girl he wanted didn't want him. In fact she told him to stay away. Now here she is passed out drunk in his car and its all his fault. Sighing he pulled into the driveway shutting the engine of the car. Lexie was asleep slightly snoring with her mouth open. She always snored when every she drank, even if it was just a little bit. Picking her up gently he managed to get the front door open and carried her inside.

"Oh my gosh what happened?" Meredith said jumping up off the couch and running over to Mark, Derek by her side. "Is she ok?" She asked sacredly

"A lot of tequila happened. What's with you Grey's and tequila?" He asks with a small laugh. Meredith just shrugs. "I found her at the bar drunk, she passed out in my car on the way here." He tells them as he heads up the steps and into Lexie's room. Laying her down on her bed he begins to take her shoes off when he fells her stirring.

"Mark." She mumbles under her breath. "I don't feel so good." She tells him before covering her mouth. The next thing she knows there's a trash can right by her and she's throwing up into it. Tears began to fall down her cheeks and she doesn't even know why. Marks rubbing circles on her back and holding her hair as she gags into the can. "Damn tequila." She mutters before laying back down on her bed. "Can you just leave?" She asks him. She doesn't want to be around him. She doesn't need him to take care of her. She's just going to go to sleep and pray to God she doesn't have a horrible hangover in the morning.

"I'm not leaving until you hear me out." He tells her as he sits down next to her. "Amelia kissed me. I pulled away. We have always had a thing for each other but that was as kids. The only girl I want is you. I Love you.

"I just wanna sleep." She mumbled as she turned on her side and pulled the blankets up to her chin.

Sighing Mark got up and walked out of the door. "I Love you Lexie." He said before turning the light off and leaving.

"I love you to Mark." she whispered before breaking down in tears wishing things didn't have to be this way.


	7. Safe

**Following the episode "Almost Grown."**

She new it was bound to happen sooner or later. She couldn't handle all this stress and being a scutt monkey all day didn't help. So she figured it was only a matter of time before she cracked yet again. She never felt safe anymore, everywhere she went in the hospital she felt like someone was watching her. Every little noise made her want to jump out of her skin. She was a walking time bomb just waiting for the right time to break down.

Everyone else was gone, she had promised Meredith shed be home after finishing up some charts. Really though she just wanted to be alone. Bringing her knees up to her chest she wrapped her arms around them and cried. She cried over the shooting, she cried over Mark, she cried until she had no more energy to cry and drifted off to sleep.

Mark new he wasn't going to win the million dollars but he didn't really mind. He was amazing as it was money or no money wouldn't change that. In fact he liked that Owen won. He was right maybe if we had had this before people wouldn't have died that awful day.

Walking past the residence locker room he realized the door was open and the light was on. Most residence had gone home an hour ago. Walking into the room he sighed when he saw Lexie curled up with her knees tucked up to her chin, head resting on her crumbled up lab coat. Walking over next to her he bent down moving some of the hair out of her face. It didn't take a genius to realize shed been crying.

He couldn't help but feel a pain of guilt in his chest. Knowing that some of those tears were because of him. He had caused her so much pain and heartache these last 9 months. He wished he could go back to when things were perfect. It was just Mark and Lexie. No Sloane and baby, no sleeping around or Alex and no Teddy. Just them two against the world. There 3% survival rate.

Gently shaking her shoulder he whispered her name. "Lex, time to go home."

"Five more minutes" she mumbles under her breath before turning her head the other way. Mark can't help but smile Lexie's never been much of a morning person.

"Come on time to get you home into your own bed." He tells her trying again. This time it seems to work.

"Mark?" She says hurrying up and wiping her tear stained eyes before sitting up quickly. "What are you doing in here?"

"Well I was on my way to my office when I heard snoring." He jokes.

"I - I don't snore." She tells him blushing.

"Lex I was kidding." He replies standing up then holding his hand out to help her up. "Come on ill take you home."

"I can walk." Lexie replies as she begins to grab her coat and bag from her locker.

"Its raining."

"I have an umbrella" She replies mater of factly.

"Its lighting." He tells her. He was going to win. He always won. Sighing she grabed her bag and followed him out the door. Mark just grinned knowing he had won.

The car ride was quiet for the most part. Both having so much to say but not knowing where to start. Everything had been so crazy in there lives right now where were they supposed to start? Pulling into Meredith and Derek's driveway he parked the car and shut it off.

"Well thanks for the a ride." Lexie says awkwardly.

"Lexie what are we doing?" Mark finally asks.

"Giving me a ride home?"

"No with us. Were spinning around in circles and not getting anywhere. Just talk to me Lex." He says sadly looking at her.

"I can't talk to you." She says in an almost whisper.

"Why? Why is it that you can not tell me what you are thinking? Don't you want to figure this out?"

She crying now for the second time that night. Taking a deep breath she starts to speak. "I came to talk to you Mark. April had made me realize that you cared that you wanted to be with me. So I went to the hospital to tell you I was sorry for being so stupid to tell you how much I missed you. How much I wanted you to be mine again. To tell you how much I loved you." She's sobbing now. "I was to late. I got to your office and I saw you Mark. I saw you with Derek's little sister."

Mark rubs his hand threw his hair. "Shit Lex. We didn't do anything except kiss I swear. I realized she wasn't you. All I want is you."

"Then why were you going to? I know you Mark and I sure as hell know you planned on sleeping with her." She's gone from sad to pissed in a matter of seconds and he knows that's not good if there going to solve anything now's the time.

"God Lex!" He promised himself he wasn't going to shout but he couldn't help it. "What was I supposed to do? You told me to leave you alone."

"And you think that I meant it?" She told him anger flashing in her eyes.

"Yea Lexie I did! You wanted nothing to do with me so I listened. I figured the least I could do at this point was move on. Move on from you and try to get on with my life. Isn't that what you wanted? For us to move on?"

"I didn't know it would hurt this much Mark! I've never felt this way for anyone before. I always left before I got left. Then I meet you and then I had sex with you and then I fell in love with you. Then Sloane came along and I got scared! I'm not ready to be a mom I can't look after someone. Hell I can't even take care of myself sometimes. So I did what I know how to do. I walked before you could walk out on me."

The two sat in silence for what seemed like hours the only sound was the sniffling of Lexie's tears. Mark ran his hands threw his hair for what seemed like the millionth time. "Lets go set on the porch." There was no point in sitting in his car all night. Grabbing her jacket and bag she walked onto the porch, Mark following. The two sat down on the swing in silence once again "Lexie do you remember those three days you were in psych?"

Turning towards him she gave him a confused look. "Not exactly I was pretty out of it most of the time."

"I was three Lexie. For 72 hours I sat by your side." He grabbed her hand and squeezed it. "Now does that sound like someone who would just leave?" She shook her head no tears pouring down her cheeks.

"I'm such an idiot." She tells him shaking her head. "I screwed up everything!" So hes cared all this time he has been by her side and she just pushed him away. She felt like such an idiot. She had no reason to push him out of her life like that. Maybe she is crazy! She thought

"Come here." Mark tells her softly as he pulls her close. "You Alexandra Grey are no idiot. Your smart and intelligent and amazing in bed if I do say so myself." He jokes and she laughs. " See there's that laugh I love to here. Your the only girl I know who can remember anything she reads. Your the only girl who's ever stolen my heart. That day when I heard the gun shot and we hid under the desk. Do you wanna know what the first thing I thought of was? It was you. I didn't care about anything else. All that mattered was getting you out of there."

"When I went out to get the blood for Alex he was there." She sobbed into his chest. "He pointed his gu-gun at me and then-" she breaks off her sentences sobs escaping her throat.

"He what Lex? Talk to me" He gently holds her face and looks right into her eyes

."He pulled the trigger."

"Oh Lexie." He says sadly wrapping his arms tightly around her. He's lucky the bastards dead."I was so scared. I thought I was going to die. I'm not supposed to be scared of death. I'm a surgeon we deal with this stuff every day."

"Its ok to be scared. Everyone gets scared of something. You have a right to be scared ok?" He tells her gently tilting her chin so there eyes are at the same level. "You have all the right in the world to be scared. Some guy went on a rampage at the one place you felt safe. Its ok to not feel safe Lex."

Right now though she did feel safe. No matter what they went threw she always felt safe when she was with him, in his arms. He was her protector no matter how much she wanted to move on from him she never would be able to. He stole her heart forever and always.

The two new they had a lot more to talk about. They had so many issues to resolve. They might never have the same relationship that they had before but for now it didn't matter. Being in each others arms, they felt safe.


	8. Days Go By

**This is the longest oneshot I have ever written!. I hope you guys enjoy it cause it took me an awful long time to write. Please review! Thanks.**

Lexie Grey walks down the halls of Seattle Grace Mercy West hospital like it was yesterday. Its been 7 years but nothing has changed. The nurses and doctors still walked the halls while the surgeons always seemed to be on top. Interns scattered around the halls trying not to ruin things and patients were being admitted every few minutes. It felt like she was home again.

Things with Lexie however had changed. Holding her hand tightly was a tiny 6 year old girl. She was the spitting image of both her mother and father. She had his eyes and charm as well as his smartalicness. Then she had her hair and frame as well as her brains. She loved to play sports especially soccer and she loved to dance. She was fun, loving and rather outgoing. She never back talked her mom and she always ate her vegetables at dinner. In Lexies eyes Madeline was the perfect daughter.

"Mommy can we get ice cream?" Madeline asked as she swung her and her moms hand back in forth.

"It's to cold outside for ice cream." Lexie tells her. "Plus were going to meet with Aunt Meredith."

"Is Nate going to be there?" She asked happily. Nate was Meredith and Derek's five year old son.

"No Nate's as school its Thursday remember?"

"Then why aren't I at school?" Madeline questioned.

"Because your Christmas break started a day earlier then his"

Madeline takes this as a reasonable answer and the continue on there journey threw the hospital. "Can I press the button on the elevator?"

Lexie nodded and Madeline ran over to the elevator. Lexie couldn't help but laugh at her daughters enjoyment. Kids loved to do the darnest things.

"Madeline wait for me." Lexie called out to her as the doors began to open. Not paying attention Madeline ran into the open door colliding with someone else.

"Ouch." The little girl said as she fell down on her butt.

"Oh gosh I'm so sorry." The man said as he helped Madeline up.

"Maddy!" Lexie shouted as she ran over to her daughter. "I told you to wait. What did mommy tell you about-" Lexie's voice trailed off as she looked up to see the man Madeline had run into.

"Lexie." He said shocked.

"Mark."

"You, you have a daughter?" He asks with utter confusion. Then he realized she couldn't have been more then five or six. That meant it had to be Avery's kid.

Madeline watches the two adults stare at each other and then suddenly she realizes she has to pee. Very badly in fact and Madeline was never one to be able to hold her bladder for long. "I have to pee." She says quickly her eyes wide.

"Her, her names Madeline ." Lexie replies with a slight stutter. The shock of just seeing him gives her butterflies.

"I have to pee!" She tells her mom for the second time this time with a stomp of the foot and a tug on her moms shirt.

The doors to the elevator open and Maddy quickly begins to tug at Lexie's arm pulling her out of the elevator before she can get in another word with Mark.

The mall at this time of the year was one busy place. Children ran around franticly as they waited to tell Santa Clause what they wanted. Parents quickly finished there last minute shopping and store employees worked there butts off trying to make the customers happy.

Lexie held Maddy's hand as they navigated threw the crowded mall while Meredith had a hold of Nate. The two were very excited to tell Santa Clause what they wanted for Christmas.

"Mommy is Santa going to know that I'm not at home this year?" she asked worriedly. "What if he brings my presents to are house and not Aunt Meredith's?"

"Santa knows everything." Nate piped in. He was the spitting image of his father with his dark eyes and hair and at the age of five he already decided he wanted to be a surgeon just like his daddy.

"Are you sure?" She asked her younger cousin skeptically.

"Positive."

The four wait in line for there turn and when it finally comes the to children run up and sit on Santa's lap. Meredith and Lexie smile as they watch them get there picture taken and tell him what they want. They both hurry back to there moms with a smile plastered on there face and a picture in there hand.

"What did you guys ask for?" Meredith asks as she looks at there photos.

"A racecar bed!" Nate tells his mom happily as she grabs his hand and they head to get cookies and hot chocolate.

"What about you?" Lexie asks looking at Madeline.

"A daddy." She says casually before her and Nate run over to the counter to pick out there cookies.

Meredith looks over at Lexie and raises her eyebrow slightly. Lexie sighs and runs her hand threw her now shoulder length straight locks. "When are you going to tell her or him?" Meredith asks after the two kids went to play in the play area and they sat drinking there coffees.

"I don't know." Lexie said as she put her head in her hands. "We ran into him today. I think he had his suspicions I mean she looks like him."

"You have got to tell him." Meredith said as she pushed Lexie's blackberry towards her. "Call him. Now."

"And Cinderella and Prince Charming lived happily ever after." Lexie said closing the book. Maddy was sitting curled up in her lap with her pjs on in there bed. They were staying with Meredith while they visited considering her house was big enough for the two.

"Mommy your going to come home right?" Maddy asked as she hugged her stuffed elephant.

"Mommy will be here when you wake up I promise." She said as she kissed her forehead and tucked her in. "Tuck, tuck, hug, hug, kiss, kiss."

"Night Mommy love you." Maddy said as she cuddled her stuffed animal and closed her eyes.

"Night baby girl." Lexie told her as she turned the light off and closed the door slightly.

Walking downstairs she found Meredith and Derek both sitting on the couch watching tv.

"She's asleep." Lexie said grabbing her coat of the coat rack. "I shouldn't be long."

"Don't worry will call you if we need you." Meredith said with a smile

"Thanks." Lexie said before slipping out the door and heading for Joes.

The bar was just the same as ten years ago. Doctors and Surgeons filled the tables and chairs as well as people from and out of town. The jukebox was playing and standing behind the counter was the one and only Joe himself.

"Well if it isn't Little Grey!" He said happily as he put down the glass he was drying to give her a hug.

"It's me." She said giving him a hug back then scanning the bar for Mark.

"Let me guess you are looking for that guy right over there in the corner." He said with a laugh pointing to Mark. "Things never change." He said with a laugh after seeing Lexie's face brighten up.

"I'll see you later Joe." She said with a smile as she walked over to Mark.

Lexie had butterflies as she walked over to Marks booth. She was scared of how tonight was going to go. He seemed egger to meet her over the phone but maybe she just imagined it. What if deep down he hated her. What if he decided he didn't want to be a father to Maddy?

"Hey stranger." He said when he saw her walking up. Sliding out of the booth and went to give her a hug. The moment she felt his warm embrace all her worries just vanished. She new that things would work themselves out.

"Its good to see you Mark." She said as they slid into opposite sides of the booth

"You too Lex."

The two sat in silence for a moment but it wasn't an awkward silence. It was comfortable, it was like they were seven years ago. They could sit in each others presence, not say a word but still have an amazing time.

"So you um you had a daughter?" Mark asked slightly uncomfortable swirling his straw in his class.

"Her names Madeline, she's six now." Lexie told him as she took a sip of her tequila sunrise.

"I'm sure Avery loves her."

At the sound of that Lexie choked on her drink and spit it back in the glass. "Excuse me what?"

"Well she is his daughter isn't she?" He asked with bitterness.

"No she is not Jackson's daughter."

"Then who's is she?" Lexie didn't say a word hoping he would realize. She didn't want to say it out loud. It took him a second but then his face dropped and he rubbed his hands over it. "She's mine."

Slowly Lexie nodded her head.

"Your telling me that for the past six years iv had a daughter, one that I didn't know about?" Lexie can hear the anger in his voice and see the hurt on his face. Just seeing him like this makes her want to cry.

"I was already gone when I found out." She says her voice cracking.

"They make telephones!"

"You had a family Mark! A family that didn't involve me!"

"She died Lexie. Sofia died! So no I didn't have a family without you."

She felt like she had been stabbed in the chest ten times in a row. Those words cut her like a knife, no make that a dagger. 'No, nobody told me."

"Ya well you walked away so why would they?" Tears roll down Lexie's face as he yells at her. She has never seen him this angry at her before.

"You knew how much it hurt me when Addison and Sloan's mom did this to me. Yet you went and did it too."

"Don't blame this all on me Mark. You picked both Sloan and Callie over me. I wasn't going to set here and watch you raise a daughter that wasn't mine with her. I just couldn't. So I left and then I found out I was pregnant. Meredith told me how happy you were about Callie and the baby. How me being gone had no affect on you. I didn't want to ruin that so I didn't tell you. So this isn't all my fault either." She told him angrily.

"I, I cant do this." Mark said quickly as he stood up and walked out of the bar.

Not even a moment later Lexie broke down crying. She may have just lost Mark again. And it would probably be the last.

Lexie looked up to find Joe standing over her. She had been sitting at the table doing shots after shots for nearly an hour.

"Meredith is coming to get you." He told her with a chuckle. The time change had not changed Lexie. She was still a Grey, a grey that loved tequila.

"I can walk home. " Lexie slurred as she stood up from the booth, gripping the table.

"Wow there." Joe said grabbing her shoulder to help keep her balance just as Meredith walked in.

"Lexie." She said with a sigh. Walking over to her very drunk sister she wrapped her arm around her and began to guide her out the door and into the car. "Thanks Joe." She told him with a smile. "Just put it on the tab."

Meredith helped Lexie slid into the passenger seat and then into her own. Meredith new there was no point in asking what went wrong. Lexie was already passed out. They arrived into the house and just as they opened the front door Lexie mumbled under her breath.

"I don't feel so good." instead of guiding her up stairs to her bedroom Meredith took her into the bathroom and placed her head over the toilet. Just in time too.

"He hates me." Lexie told Meredith as the tears began to fall. "He told me I, I was just like Addison and, and Riley."

"Oh Lex." Meredith said as she pulled her close and held her crying sister.

"Where is Mommy?" Maddy asked as her and Nate came and sat down at stoles along the counter.

"Mommy is still sleeping." Meredith told her. "She doesn't feel to good this morning."

"Oh." Maddy said as she placed her head on her hands.

"How about you too help me make gingerbread cookies?" Meredith asked the two little kids. She new that would cheer Maddy up.

"Ya!" they two said happily as Meredith began to get the ingredients out.

The cookies were now in the oven and both kids were covered in baking ingredients. Meredith chuckled as she took pictures of the two with her camera. There was a knock on the door and both kids ran to answer it.

"What did I tell you too about answering the door?" Meredith asked as she followed them into the hall.

"It's just Uncle Mark." Nate said as he gave Mark a hug. Maddy just stood off in the distance watching the two.

"Mark." Meredith said with no excitement off all. "Why don't you too go wash up?" Meredith told Maddy and Nate.

Once the children were gone Meredith led Mark into the office. "What do you want Mark?"

"I came to see Lexie."

"I don't think that is such a good idea."

"Meredith I'm in idiot." He told her as he ran his hands through his hair.

"Yeah, you are." She said in a sort of duh tone. "You hurt her bad Mark."

"You don't think she hurt me? She kept my daughter from me!"

"Your right, she did when she shouldn't have but that gives you no right to treat her how you did last night." Meredith told him going into big sister mode.

"Just let me talk to her."

Meredith sighed. She new Lexie would be mad at her if she told Mark yes. "I'll have her call you." She told him. "If she wants to speak with you."

"Be careful!" Lexie shouted at the two children running towards the play ground. Meredith had gotten off early and the two decided to take the kids to the park. It wasn't terribly cold out so they bundled them up in there coats and gloves and headed to the park. It had been a day since Lexie and Marks encounter and she still didn't have the courage to speak with him.

"We should probably get the rest of there Christmas Shopping done." Meredith told Lexie as they sat on the bench talking. "Christmas is in only two days."

"Your right. You think we can get Derek to watch them tomorrow afternoon?" Lexie asked.

"I'm sure we-" Meredith was cut off as they heard a scream and then a cry. Both parents jumped up and ran over to the play ground. Madeline was on the ground crying as she held her leg, blood covered her jeans.

"Mommy." The little girl cried.

Lexie and Meredith both bent down to see what the matter was. "Let Mommy see your cut." Lexie said as she began to role up the little girls pants leg, only causing her to cry more.

"She is going to need stitches." Meredith told Lexie once they saw the deepness of the cut. Digging threw her purse Meredith pulled out a napkin to help with the bleeding.

"Mommy it hurts." Maddy cried into Lexie's shoulder.

"Were going to take you to the doctor to get you all fixed up ok baby girl?" With a sniffle Maddy nodded and Lexie carefully picked her up and carried her to the car.

Once at the hospital they headed for the emergency room. It was fairly empty which was a good thing in Lexie's eyes that meant they would get Maddy fixed up quicker.

"Meredith, Lexie what are you doing here?" Derek asked when he spotted his wife, sister in law and there kids. "What's wrong with Maddy?" He asked once he noticed the crying girl.

"She fell and hurt her knee. She's going to need stitches." Lexie told him.

"How about we get you fixed up?" Derek told his niece with a smile as he kissed her forehead. He helped get them a small room then went off to fine Mark.

"What have we got here?" Mark asked as he entered the room, Maddy's chart in hand. Looking up he saw Lexie holding Maddy and he stopped. "What happened?"

"She fell and cut her leg." Lexie said.

"Alright miss Maddy how about we get you fixed up?" Mark said as he sat down on a stole and pulled his gloves on. "This is only going to sting for a second ok?" Maddy nodded and dug her head deeper into her moms shoulder. Mark slowly suck the needle in the cut to numb it. Lexie smoothed the back of her head as she cried.

"Were almost done." mark told her soothingly. "All done." He said as he took the needle out. Now you wont be able to feel a thing. He told her.

Twenty minutes later Mark was putting a band aid on Maddy's fixed cut. "Are you my daddy?" Once he was done Maddy looked around the room to make sure her mom was still gone. She had left to go fill out paper work now that she new Maddy was ok. "My mommies in love with you." She told him

Mark shot his head up. "Excuse me what?"

"I heard her talking to Aunt Meredith the other day. She said she loves you and then Aunt Meredith said that Mommy should tell you."

"Tell me what?" Mark asked with a raised eyebrow

"I dunno then they started to whisper. Mommy do I get a sucker." Maddy asked when Lexie came back into the room.

"Of course you get one." Lexie said as she picked Maddy up. "Thanks for fixing her up." She told Mark with a smile.

"Yeah, uh no problem." He said running his hands through his hair as the two left.

The next day Lexie was busy wrapping Maddy's gift while she had the house to herself. Maddy had insisted she go buy Lexie a Christmas gift even thought Lexie had told her she didn't need one, and Meredith had volunteered to take her. Maddy's gifts were sprawled across the floor along with tape, wrapping paper and scissors, Christmas music playing threw the stereo. Lexie was in the middle of wrapping up a Barbie doll when the doorbell rang.

Lexie stomach instantly started to flutter when she opened the door to find Mark standing there. How is it that even when there fighting he still brings butterflies to her stomach and made her heart race. Stepping out of the way she made room for him to come in. "Look if you came to yell at me, tell me how I'm a horrible mom for keeping you away then you can just leave." She told him as she walked back into the living room.

"Lexie." Mark called after her. "I already lost one daughter, I don't want to lose another."

Lexie sighed. "I know I shouldn't have kept you two from each other but I really thought you didn't want me. You had chosen Callie and if I had known what happened then maybe-" Lexie trailed off as tears streamed down her face.

"Come here." Mark said pulling her close and wrapping his arms around her.

"Don't hate me." She sobbed into his shoulder. "I can't have you hating me."

"I could never hate you Lexie." He whispered as he rubbed her back.

"Really?" She asked as she looked up at him, eyes read and cheeks stained with tears.

"Not in a million years." He said with a smile as he bent down and kissed her.

"Mommy, Mommy, Mommy!" Maddy yelled as she ran into her moms room and began to jump on her, waking her up. "Santa Clause came!"

"Madeline Grace." Lexie said as she grabbed the little girl and began to tickle her. "What did Mommy tell you about waking her up?"

"Not to do it because Mommy needs all the sleep she can get." Maddy said between fits of laughter.

"That's right."

"But Mommy its Christmas! Santa Clause came!" Maddy said crossing her arms.

"Oh yea today's Christmas." Lexie said pretending she had forgotten. "Lets go see what Santa brought." Lexie said picking up Maddy and throwing her over her shoulder. Maddy squirmed and laughed the whole way downstairs until Lexie tossed her on the couch. With a giggle Maddy sat up and ran over to sit by Nate on the floor.

"Can we open are presents now?" Both kids asked happily.

The three adults looked at each other and with a nod they told the two to dig in. One hour later the living room was full of wrapping paper, and new toys. Derek was helping Nate put together his new train set while Maddy played with her new DS. Meredith and Lexie were sitting back on the couch drinking hot chocolate when there was a knock on the door. Meredith looked at Lexie and smiled knowing exactly who it was.

"Merry Christmas." Mark said when he and Lexie returned a moment later. He had two gifts in one hand and Lexie's in the other.

"Hey Maddy can I talk to you for a second." Lexie asked her daughter who was sprawled out on the floor playing her game.

"Sure." Maddy said as she turned her game off and followed her mom into the kitchen.

"Come here," Lexie told Maddy with a smile. Not knowing what was going on Maddy sat down on her moms lap. "You remember Mark right?" Lexie asked as she nodded towards Mark who was sitting next to her.

"Yup he is the doctor who fixed me knee and the one you and Aunt Meredith were talking about."

Lexie looked at Mark and blushed. "Well what if I told you he was your daddy?"

Maddy's face lit up. "So Santa did bring me my daddy for Christmas?" She asked happily with a big smile before hugging Lexie then going and hugging Mark. "I love you daddy."

"I love you too baby girl." Mark said with the biggest smile he has had on his face in a long time.


	9. He Knows

He doesn't know that she is stress eater. Any time she is nervous, scared, or sad she eats. He doesn't know that peanut butter cups are her favorite, but not the big ones the snack size ones.

He doesn't know that when she is sick she just wants to be held. She doesn't care who it is or what is wrong with her. She just needs someone to hold her and comfort her by stroking her head softly.

He doesn't know that she can recite the periodic table backwards and forwards or that she hates apples but loves apple juice

He doesn't know that she wishes her mother was still alive and that any time she gets the hiccups, her insides cringe and she will do anything to make them go away.

But Mark does. He knows to keep a bag of reeses in his apartment and in her hospital locker just in case.

He knows that when she is sick she likes to be held.

He knows that she knows the periodic table backwards and forwards. He knows that she hates apples but loves apple juice.

He knows that any time she has the hiccups he is to keep them off her mind. He will scare her, give her water help her stand on her head and hold her breath, anything to get the hiccups off her mind until she realizes there gone.

He knows that she is allergic to eggs and that she doesn't have a favorite color. He knows that ever since she was a little kid she wont let her feet hang off the bed or that she hates scary movies.

He knows that her favorite movie is A Walk To Remember and that every time she watches it she cries. Or that she can finish a book in a matter of hours and not forget a single thing about it.

He knows how to get her to squirm. He knows that she is ticklish on her feet and neck. He knows her favorite places to touched.

Mark knows everything about her while Jackson barely knows her favorite food.

Now the question is do you go with the man you feel comfortable with? The man that knows you maybe even better then your self or do you go with the man who makes you come alive the man that shows you a new light on life?

She has a choice, just one choice, a choice that will shape the rest of her life. Who will she chose?


	10. Easy

_We broke up_

_yeah, it's tough_

_most guys would've been crushed_

_Wastin' their time_

_Wonderin' where they went wrong_

_No way, not me_

_Hey, I'm doing just fine_

_I'm not afraid of movin' on_

Mark was going to be fine. He wasn't going to waist his time thinking about her, thinking about what they could have been. He wasn't afraid to just forget about everything they had gone through, the good, the bad and the ugly. He wasn't afraid to move on he want afraid to start something great with someone new, someone who cared. He wanted the American dream. The white picket fence, the wife cooking dinner, the kids playing in the front yard. He wanted a family.

_It's easy going out on a Friday night_

_Easy every time I see her out_

_I can smile, live it up_

_The way a single guy does_

_But what she, what she don't know_

_Is how hard it is to make it look so_

_Easy_

He goes out with the guys. Has a few drinks and makes everything look so easy. He makes it look like he is the happiest guy in the world. He flirts, he buys girls drinks, he even takes some home with him. When he sees her around nothing changes. He keeps up with the act, the smiles, the happiness. Nobody knows how hard it is for him to make it look so easy, like everything is ok, but himself.

_The truth is_

_That I miss lyin' in those arms of his_

_But I don't ever let it show_

_I laugh and I act like_

_I'm having the time of my lifeas far as he knows_

She misses him. She misses everything about him. She missed waking up next to him with his arms wrapped tightly around her. She misses that feeling of safety, he's her security blanket. But instead she goes out with Jackson. She smiles as he kisses her and laughs at his jokes. To everyone around her it looked like she was happy. Like she was having the best time of her life with the man of her dreams.

_It's easy goin' out on a Friday night_

_Easy, everytime I see him out_

_I can smile, live it up_

_The way a single girl does_

_But, what he, what he don't know_

_Is how hard it is to make it look so_

_Easy_

_Oh, it's easy_

She goes out with Jackson. She smiles and looks happy. She tries to tell herself she is with the right guy. Jackson likes her, he makes her happy, he makes her feel like she belongs. When she see's him out with other girls, she smiles, she pretends it doesn't hurt, when deep down she thinks her heart breaks a little every time. But nobody see's that. They see the girl with the big grin on her face, her boyfriends arms wrapped around her waist. They don't see how hard it is for her to put up the act, to make it look like she doesn't care, they don't see how hard it is to make her life and her recent break up look easy.


	11. A Future Without You, Is No Future

"I need you to watch Lexie." Meredith tells Mark as she comes up behind him at the nurses station, Zola on her hip.

"I'm not a babysitter." The plastic surgeon informs the older Grey.

"She's sick and I have a meeting with the chief, probably about firing me. And I still have to drop Zola off at the day care and I don't have time to take her back home. And Jackson left this morning to go visit with his family." Meredith explained as she repositioned Zola who was happily content.

"Alright I'll go watch her but what's wrong with her?" He asked as he closed the chart he had been scribbling in.

"She lost her cookies in the elevator. Twice."

Mark had two choices on how to handle this. He could take her home and be done with this whole situation or he could actually take care of her. He new Lexie was like a helpless puppy when she was sick. But the last time the two had talked was a week ago when he had told her to walk away. Not something that he was exactly happy about doing.

Mark walked into the break room only to find Lexie curled up in a chair her head leaned back and eyes closed. It was obvious that she was in one of the most uncomfortable positions ever.

"Why don't you go lay down in an on call room?" He asks from the doorway.

Lexie doesn't even bother to open her eyes. "There all being used." She mumbled

When she talked it sounded like she was using all her effort she could muster up. Her voice was weak and tired sounding. She had her hair thrown back into a pony tail and there were little beads of sweat forming on her forehead. When she looked at him he could tell she was going to burst into tears any minute.

"Do you want to go home?" Mark asked as he placed a hand on her clammy forehead. Lexie nodded her head as her eyes watered. "Alright lets get you home." They were almost to the door when Lexie bent over in pain, then proceeded by throwing up, all over Marks shoes. Mark looked at Lexie then looked back down at his shoes. "Alright forget going home. Were going to get you checked out by Dr. Bailey."

Lexie laid back in her hospital bed as she tried to ignore the pain in her abdomen and the sudden urge to throw up. She felt like shit and she was in a hospital. Weren't they supposed to give her something?

"Appendicitis." Dr. Bailey said as she walked in with Lexie's chart. "What is with you Grey sisters needing appendectomies?"

Lexie ignored the question. "Does this mean I get morphine? Because this hurts, like really really hurts."

Mark couldn't help but laugh causing Lexie to glare at him. "Don't laugh at me. You do not get to laugh at me."

Meredith walked into Lexie's room half an hour later. Mark had been paged so she figured Lexie needed some company. Zola could hang out at the daycare for just a little while.

"Appendicitis hu?" Meredith asked as she walked into the room.

"I threw up all over Marks shoes." Lexie informed her sister.

"I'm sure he liked that."

Lexie looked at Meredith and grinned. "Not as much as other things I did to him." Meredith stared as Lexie shocked. It had to be the morphine talking right now. It was just like her appendectomy all over again. "We used to do this thing where I-"

"Lexie. I do not want to hear about you and Marks sex life right now."

"It was such a good sex life." Lexie said with a sigh. "I mean I broke his penis. You have to be having really good sex to break someone's penis."

"Lexie you have Jackson now."

"Jackson isn't McSteamy. Jackson's a nice guy. But he doesn't know everything about me. He's just a distraction." Lexie said with a sigh. "I should break up with him. He doesn't deserve to be put through this."

Lexie reaches over to grab the phone but Meredith stops her. "Wait until tomorrow to call him. This is just the morphine talking. You. You don't want to really break up with Jackson."

Lexie sighed. "Is it bad that I compare him to Mark?"

"That is just wrong."

"I know because nobody can be compared to Mark in bed."

"Alright Grey. Time to get you prepped for surgery." Alex said as he walked into the room.

"Now he was good in bed." Lexie said as she pointed at Alex. "But still not as good as Mark."

Alex looked over at Meredith. "She has been talking about Mark and sex for the past half hour."

"You two really are sisters."

Lexie sleepily woke up later on that afternoon. Mark was sitting in a chair flipping threw a medical journal.

"How yeah feeling?" Mark asked as he put is journal down and sat at the edge of her bed.

"Tired."

"No urge to throw up on my shoes again?" He asked with a smirk.

"Nope." Lexie said with a grin.

"Well I'll let you rest then." Mark said as he stood up.

"Stay." Lexie said as she reached out and grabbed his arm.

Mark sighed. "Lexie your with Jackson."

"When I think of my future I see me and you. Not me and Jackson." She tells him. "You're my future Mark, Jackson he, he's just a stop in the road."

Mark didn't want to do this not right now. He was tired of the back in forth between the two of them. "Just last week you told me he made you happy Lex, and if he makes you happy then you should be with him."

"He doesn't know anything about me. He doesn't know that I hate the hiccups, or that tagalongs are my favorite girl scout cookies. He doesn't know that when I'm sick I like to be held. He doesn't know that I cry every single time I watch The Notebook. But you do Mark. You know me better then anybody else out there."

"Lexie." Mark said as he came and sat down at the edge of her bed.

Her eyes filled with tears. "Please just give me one more chance Mark. I - I wont run, I wont freak out about our future any more because a future with out you isn't a future to me."

Mark gently touched her face wiping away the tears that had fallen before bending down and kissing her gently. It only lasted a mere second but when the two broke apart they couldn't help but smile. Mark crawled into bed pulling Lexie close as she laid her head on his chest taking in the scent she had missed so much in the last few months.


	12. Rainy Days

"You know I hate football." Lexie told Mark looking up at him. The two were lying on the couch, Mark at one end and Lexie sprawled out, her head on his lap.

"You know I love you?" He said with a smile, Lexie just frowned.

"Is it ever going to stop raining?" She asked as she threw her legs over the end of the couch and stood up walking over to the window. It had been storming all afternoon.

"We live in Seattle." Mark said with a small chuckle. "It never stops raining."

"Well I'm bored." After hearing no reply from Mark she sighed. "I guess I'll just watch the raindrops slide down the window." She told him sadly.

"Have fun."

Mark continued to watch the game and Lexie new she had to think of something. If Mark had it his way he would sit there and drink beer and watch football all day. She did not want that to happen. Walking up behind where he was sitting on the couch she wrapped her arms around his neck leaning in near his ear.

"Wanna go take a shower with me?" She asked him seductively.

"Maybe later."

Lexie groaned as she walked around the couch and sat back down.

"I think that our bed is getting awful lonely."

Mark looked at Lexie with one eye raise. "Oh is it?"

"I think it might be." She told him as she sat down on his lap. "We have been spending in awful lot of time at the hospital and it isn't getting the amount of use it deserves."

"Are you trying to get in my pants Little Grey?"

"Is it working?" Lexie asked as she trailed her finger down Marks chest.

"Ah, what the hell." He tells her as he stands up with her in his arms.

"What about the game?" Lexie asks with a grin.

"That's what TiVo's for." Mark said as he threw her on the bed and leaned over her. There was a big clap of thunder and the next thing the two knows the lights are off. "Even better." Mark said as he began to kiss Lexie from her lips moving down her neck.

"I new storms were good for one thing." Lexie said as she pulled Marks shirt off.


	13. Then I Did

She could barely see the city through the clouds and his name automatically popped into her head. It always did when she reached Seattle. He was a part of the city. She wonders if she should call him as she walks down the terminal and to baggage claim. She always wonders if she should call him. Yet in the many trips she has taken back her to visit with Meredith or her dad, she never has.

It had been nearly three years. Three long years since she has seen him, talked to him, kissed him. She remembers it like the day was yesterday.

_Lexie sat curled up on the couch with a cup of coffee in her hand. So much was running through her mind she didn't know what to do. She had been offered her dream job; A Fellowship at Johns Hopkins. When she applied for it nearly three months ago she never thought she would actually get it. They were one of the best ranked hospitals in the country. But she had and now she had to choose, go to Baltimore and have the career opportunity of a life time or stay here in Seattle. _

_An hour later Mark walked through the apartment door threw his jacket on the chair and plopped down next to Lexie and leaning in for a kiss. The moment there lips touched he knew something was wrong. "What's wrong?"_

"_I got accepted for the fellowship at Johns Hopkins." Lexie said looking up at him. "And I think I'm going to take it."_

"_Lexie that's great!" Mark said as he wrapped his arms around her._

"_Iv always wanted this and its like my dreams are really coming true." She says into his shoulder as one small tear falls down her face and lands on his shirt._

She drives down the familiar streets of Seattle. As she drives to their old apartment she feels like it was just yesterday that the two of them were lying in bed curled up in each other's embrace. Memories come flooding back.

"_I don't want to go to work today." She said with a smile as her head rested on his bare chest._

"_I think I have a better idea." Mark says as he kissed her head before crawling out of bed. _

"_What's that?" Lexie asked as she sat up, the sheet wrapped around her naked form._

"_Get dressed. I'll call the hospital. "_

_Thirty minutes later the two were driving around Seattle with the windows down and music blasting._

"_The Chief told me I should start applying for my Fellowships." Lexie said as she looked out the window._

"_That is probably a smart idea." Mark said as he changed the radio station._

"_I don't want to leave Seattle."_

"_Lexie." Mark said as he turned off the radio. "You have wanted a Fellowship at Mass Gen or Hopkins for ages. Apply."_

_She bit her lip and nodded. "Ok I'll apply."_

She looked up at the paper that had the address Meredith had given her. It was his address. She wasn't surprised that he no longer lived in that small apartment. After all he had Sofia, she was nearly four now and she deserved a nice big house with a backyard and a playroom. As she pulls down the weaving road that she assumes is his driveway she can't help but get butterflies.

The words he last said to her still play like a film in her mind.

"_Flight 235 to Baltimore please get ready to board your flight." _

"_That's you." Mark said as he sat up and held out his arm to help Lexie up. _

"_I I can't do this." She said as a tear fell down her face. "I can't leave Seattle, leave you."_

"_Look at me." Mark told her as he tilted her chin up so the two were looking into each other eyes. "You've been waiting all your life for a break like this. It's your chance of a lifetime. You gotta go find those dreams." He said as he kissed her one last time before turning her around and giving her the nudge she needed to walk away. _

But he was wrong. Love was what she wanted all along.

She puts her car into park and walks up to the front door. She knocks and not even two seconds later there he is standing in front of her for the first time in three years, three long years.

"Lexie." He says as a look of shock and surprise fills his face.

"You were wrong." She tells him. "Love was what I wanted all along." And then their lips come crashing together.


End file.
